Toe Fetish

Every child has a comfort habit. It might be normal, like thumb sucking. Or you could be one of those "lucky" parents whose kids have a completely unique and sometimes awkward, habit. Like me. Leave it to my kids to find a habit that can actually gross me out. And I'm hard to gross out.

I've noticed the past few weeks that while Ashe happily sits down to watch his favorite tv show that once in awhile he's munching on his toes. No, I did not make a typo there. You read it right. He munches on his TOES. Don't ask me why, I've been scratching my head in bewilderment and anytime I ask him why he just shrugs and goes back to nomming on his big toe.

The first time I witnessed this I froze mid step and watched in awe as I noticed his tiny toddler body contorted in a way that would make any Yoga Master insanely jealous. My eyes wandered from head to toe (ok they were touching so I guess that goes without saying) taking it all in. I think it took me about 20 seconds for my mind to actually comprehend that his toes were in his mouth and he was happily sucking on them. Then I gagged (have you ever seen little boys bare feet after running around the house? I mean I have a clean.... ok as clean as you can get with 3 kids.... house but STILL!!!!!) and went over to him.
"Ashe take your feet out of your mouth."
"SMFSUREHFS?"
"I cant understand you. Take your feet out of your mouth."
"HDSAIUWSJTHRRRG."
"Count of 3 Ashe. 1....2...."
"I SAID WHY MOMMY? WHY FEET OUT OF MOUTH?"
"Because it's gross dude!!! Do you have any idea where you're feet have been?"
"YAH. IN MY MOUTH!"


You can't argue with logic like that.

Socks don't work. Even before this issue started Ashe was adamant about taking off his socks the moment he got inside. Slippers worked for only a day until the novelty wore off. Shoes aren't worn in the house because Soren likes to sprawl on the floor and Ashe is notorious for not paying attention to where he is walking already. So I just have to catch him in the act as many times as possible and try to get him to quit it. So far it's not working so well.

And it's not just HIS toes either. It's toes in general. Anytime Sorens little toes are out in the open Ashe will come by grab his little feet, and kiss them to death. He's gone for my feet once or twice but a good Mommy glare and a quietly growled "Don't you even think about it Mister" has kept him at bay so far. If only it were that easy to get him to stop chomping on his own little digits.

I'm really at a loss as to how to handle this. Xavier was a thumb sucker for just a little while and I ignored it until he stopped on his own by age 4. Soren is no where near old enough to start developing his own odd habits. So this is new territory for me. If he doesnt stop on his own am I going to get phone calls when he starts school from the teachers asking me to pick up my son because he got stressed out during a pop quiz and ripped off his sneakers to chew on his pinkie toe? I keep imagining that he wont stop and will have a toe fetish as an adult. I guess I might have to try to influence him towards foot models as a potential spouse. I can already imagine having "The Talk" with him and adding in the footnote (ha! that's funny) that NO means NO and that includes toe munching.


Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll grow out of it soon. In the meantime, I'll just do my best and try to get him to stop if I catch him in the act and try to redirect his attention to something more yummy. I'm not above bribery by any means. And it could always be worse. He could have attachment issues to something even weirder, like underwear. There is that to be thankful for I guess.