...my child sold your honor student the answers to the test...

Saturday, April 17, 2010

What I Learned Today

It's funny how some days you go through your day and nothing seems to change,  and other days are packed with new things you learn or pick up. Today I had the latter type of day. So without further ado...

What I Learned Today

* I learned that baby bottles are never ever ever to go on the bottom of our new dishwasher. Ever.

* I learned that if I want J to remember to bring my phone charger and red hair dye from the old house to the new house, I need to verbally remind him 25 times, write out a map complete with written directions on where to find said stuff and what it looks like, spam text him as he is driving over to remind him yet again, and call a few times, just in case. Cause you know, if not, he may forget it a few times (or not know what the hell I'm talking about). To give him credit, I should not have expected him to know where my red hair dye is, even though it's been in the same bathroom drawer for almost 3 years. (Note: I did not do any of these things and I don't nag him that much. I promise)

* I learned that I can wear a corset to a Mommys event and walk with my head held high. Now, even despite the fact I love to rebel it up a bit as a Mom, I still had lines I wasn't quite ready to cross. Wearing a corset to a Mommy Event was one of those odd lines I mentally drew. However, I had little choice in the matter. I can not find half of my clothing as we're still in the middle of moving and unpacking and it was either wear a shirt I had yet to wash, wear my see through Bulls baseball teeshirt, or wear my corset. J urged me to wear the corset. And after a little hemming and hawing, I finally did. And you know what? I'm glad I did! And I think I'll do it again!

* I learned that I *most definitely* have ADHD, And no, the H isn't missing as I previously thought it was (due to the fact I never seem to have enough energy to keep up with my kids). I learned that the H in adults is different than the H in children. The H in adults shows up as excessive talking (or run on sentences ha!)  and bouncing around when excited.  I was informed of this by my friend, who also has ADHD, and she took one look at me while I was at an event after I said I was missing the H part of ADHD and she said "Oh sweetie, you're not missing the H part. It's definitely there."

* I learned the wonder of Ritalin. Ooooh confession time! *shhhh* I tried some Ritalin today after being told I definitely have ADHD. Over the past several months I have noticed a very big correlation to Xaviers behaviors in regards to ADHD and my own. It's really dawned on me that we share a lot of the same symptoms. I don't know if it's because I am just seeing how they are in him as he ages and how similar our reactions to things are, or if I might actually be getting worse as I get older. However I had a *Light Dawns On Marble Head* incident the other week when the AC man showed up a day early and instead of being excited, I was thrown for a loop and honestly? Not that happy. I realized it's that whole transition issue that Xavier deals with daily. If something happens that I am not expecting, even if it's good, I have a very hard time mentally adjusting to add it in. I mean seriously, I was perturbed that the AC guy, the one I was dying for to show up, came a day early (...not that he actually did anything and in my defense he flipping showed up during my Witching Hour.)

So I tried Ritalin for the first time today after all these puzzle pieces fit together and all I can say is WHOA! I can't even begin to describe the difference but I will try. I went from having a hard time concentrating with all the sound and activities scrambling for front row attention in my mind, to being able to compartmentalize each one into its own unit and then being able to go from one to the other, all without that undercurrent of panic or anxiety. I was calm. I was able to follow through one task, then another, then another, while also being able to follow multiple conversations and staying on track. I was able to deal with a crying tired baby, a rambunctious 3 yr old, and a whiny 8 yr old at the same time, and I never once felt that flare up of panic I normally feel. It was just surreal. And amazing. And I realized, no learned...

* I learned that Monday morning I need to make an appointment with my DR to get reevaluated for ADHD. Because after realizing how hard it has been without medication, and now seeing how I can actually *DO* things without that panic feeling.... it was a huge weight off my shoulder to know maybe it's not just me, but something I can actually push back. Maybe I don't have to always feel like I'm going to lose it. I mean, any mom of 3 kids feels that ways anyways, but I have ALWAYS felt like that. I'm hopeful now, that I may have something to help me be what I guess what the majority of people feel like on a daily basis.

* I learned that I love food shopping by myself. Seriously. I stood there in the aisle without my kids, looking around, and I realized that it was the first time in weeks I have felt relaxed. Really relaxed! I took my time browsing the breads, I meandered up and down the meat aisle, pondering which products to buy for future dinners. I sat there debating between bananas or Clementines, without having to worry about impending tantrums. I sampled wine, both red and white, despite the fact I dont like white wine. Normally with kids I would not do that. I have this idea that a Mom with a red stripe in her hair, with 3 kids in tow, sampling wine might not look so good to non Parental units. I know the rest of you Moms and Dads would understand but again.... mental line folks. I also stocked up on Wine and beer, and took my time looking at the different brews. I wandered the frozen food section, looking at all the delectable items, and gave each one my undivided attention as I mentally prepared each for dinner, trying to determine which would get the least dirty looks from the kids. 

* I learned I am not allowed to go food shopping by myself. There is a reason we bring our kids out shopping. I just didnt realize it until today. We bring our children because subconsciously we know that they will keep us in line, on our crayon written shopping list task, never to deviate from it, in order to get in get out before tantrums set in.... which leads to us not overspending. This is my new theory. I came up with it after the woman at the register told me my total sum. Yup, totally not allowed to go food shopping by myself anymore.

* I learned that if I put food on tiny square dishes I unearthed when unpacking, I can get my 3 yr old excited to eat, especially if I call them "Ashes Plates".  Dude, the moment I said that his eyes lit up and he was stoked to sit down for dinner. Note to self: either find more of those mini plates or buy more dish detergent so I always have a clean one on hand. 

* I learned that Soren learned how to climb a stair today (Yay for milestones!!) 

* I learned I need to be more anal about making the older boys flush the toilet after they go and to shut the bathroom door when they are done. Soren and toilets. Good times.

* I learned that Ashe is very good at acting. So good he had both J and I fooled for a bit tonight, when Xavier kept running down to tell us Ashe was bugging him in bed. First J went up and saw Ashe looking totally passed out and thought Xavier was making up stories. Then I went up and saw Ashe totally "passed out". However I decided to see if he really was. 
He pops up like a jack in the box. "YES MOMMY?"
"Are you bugging Zavi?"
"YES MOMMY." (at least he was honest)
"Knock it off or you're going to be in trouble."

2 minutes after I left Xavier said he was doing it again. Again, Ashe was pretending to be passed out. I admit that he is really good at looking asleep. He didn't move a muscle when I came in until I spoke to him.  I moved Xavier into our room for the time being and warned Ashe to leave him alone. 2 minutes later I heard Zavi whining again. I brought the gate up and warned Ashe if he did it again I would take his Dadet (blankie). He fervently promised not to do it again, clutching tightly to his blankie. 
This time, I sat on the stairs after making noises like I went down and waited. Sure enough I watched a little Ashe shadow creeping towards the Master Bedroom, and within seconds, Xavier started to call out for me. The moment he did I heard a giggle and watched Ashes shadow run back to his room, and he jumped in bed, threw the covers over him, and pretended to sleep.


True to  my word though I took his blankie despite his tears and waited for him to sob a little and apologize. After explaining to him that this is not play time and he was being mean for keeping his brother up, I made him go say sorry to Xavier. The two hugged each other, I gave Ashe his blankie back, and warned him that if he wants to be a big boy to stay in bed. Otherwise I'll treat him like a baby and put a gate up so he cant get out. He hasn't bothered Xavier since. (I did take the time to explain to Zavi that Ashe wasn't doing it out of malicious intent but that he loved Xavier and wanted to play with him. It made Xavier look at it in a whole new light.

* I learned not to use Dead when I give my list of acceptable reasons for calling me or J after bed. I usually say "Do not call out for me unless you are hurt, dying or dead!" Tonight, Xavier decided to question the dead part:
"How can I call you if I'm dead?"
"Ummmm... you'll find a way, I'm sure."
"But I couldn't mom, I would be DEAD. D-E-A-D!!"
"If anyone could talk after being dead sweetie it would be you. I have no worries on that. Go to sleep." 
"But Mooooom, the dead can't TALK!"
Through gritted teeth "Go. To. Sleep....Now"
"But can you just tell me how I am supposed to tell you I'm dead?"

* And lastly, I learned, that in our new location, our baby monitor picks up Big Band music as well as the train whistle when it goes by. Either that, or Soren is a very talented musician at the age of 9 months and also had a diaper explosion I just don't want to know about.  

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