...my child sold your honor student the answers to the test...

Friday, January 6, 2012

The Talk 2.0

If you been following me for a long time you remember the time I had a talk with Xavier. Well Xavier is 9 and a half now and his brother Ashe is following in his footsteps. Recently I found myself yet again in a position of awkwardness as I was asked questions about sex, this time coming out of the mouth of my 4 year old in the backseat of the car. And of course the weather was miserable so it was doubly difficult to pay attention to the road and to answer the questions of sex piping from the back seat.
I don't understand why it's always me that gets asked these questions. I mean I'm not the only parent in the household. And you would think that the boys with gravitate towards their father with these types of questions. But oh no it's always me, and always when I am alone without my partner in crime to help give me back up. I remember the last time Xavier brought up sex to me J was on a business trip up in Massachusetts. Somehow his questions when from sex to learning about the female cycle. I swear that 9 year old boy knows more about menstruation the most teenage girls.
But this time it was Ashe to ask the awkward questions. As he asked the inevitable where do babies come from, I at least felt a little bit more confident in answering as I'd already gone through it once before. So I'm driving along in the rain with the kids in the backseat talking about sperm and eggs, the spiel on a man and women loving each other getting married and how sex equals babies.
I decided this time around to really push the importance of responsibility. I explained how sex can make babies and how babies are a lot of work. I told him that he had better be ready and responsible before having sex and making babies. First he had to be a grown up which in our household equals 18. Then he had to have a steady job, and his own place to live, before he could even consider sex and there for babies.
He grew quiet in the backseat as he contemplated this vast responsibility. And then he almost made me drive off the road as he said don't worry mommy I will practice a lot before I start making babies.
It took all my will not to slam on the brakes and scream the hell you will! Fortunately before I could react this way he clarified by saying I will get myself a good job and be responsible before I have babies.
I hope you do kid I hope you do.

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