I have three boys!
Holy shit, really???? I had no freaking clue! When the hell did this happen? Have I been drunk for the past seven years and totally not know this? Seriously folks, how did I miss the fact that I have not one, not two, but THREE boys???? Call the fucking press!!!!
Take tonight for instance. We went out as a family for dinner. Soren has now reached that age where going out to a sit down place is not only imaginable but feasible. J and I are stoked that we can finally forgo drive thru's for real, honest to goodness meat! So we head to the local tavern which offers amazing burgers. The boys so far, are really well behaved. Of course, we had just gotten out of the van. We hadn't even opened the restaurant's door when an older woman patted me on the shoulder. I turn around.
Old Lady: "Oh my dear, are those children all yours?"
Me, smiling: "Yes, they are."
Old Lady: "Goodness, you have all boys! Well, I know what YOU do every day!"
She pats me again on the shoulder and walks away, chuckling.
Later on, as we're sitting around waiting for our order, I'm engrossed in coloring the place mat with Soren when I feel another tap on my shoulder. I turn around and it's another older lady. I smile at her
Old Lady #2: "Dearie, you have three boys!!!"
Me: "Yes, yes I do."
Old Lady #2: Goodness, how do you do it?"
I stopped myself from offering the wonderful uses of duct tape and benadryl. With older ladies, you just never know how they would react. So I just smiled and shrugged. She mentioned the boys were angels and left.
Oddly enough, the same day I had a woman approach me in the grocery store when I had the two younger boys with me, and she said almost the same thing.
Now look. I am grateful and appreciate when people stop by and offer acknowledgement for the work it takes to raise children. But what is it with people having to point out the obvious? I almost want to say " you know, Ashe over there, was actually born a girl, but I was so distraught he didn't have a penis that I had him go through constructive surgery to add one on, along with a faux adam's apple. You can't tell though. The doctors did an amazing job!" JUST to see what the response would be.
Yes people, I have three boys. Three children with the XY chromosome. Three children with penises. Three children who rough and tumble, love the words poops, butt, pee pee, etc. Three children who try to outdo one another if someone either burps or farts. There is NO WAY I could not see this fact. It's pretty obvious, both out in public, and in the private of my own home when one or two of them wander around sans pants.
But you know what? I wouldn't have it any other way.