COCK WITH ME!

Listening to little kids as they start to navigate the way of words and talking is one of the most entertaining times of having kids. It's probably my all time favorite thing about toddlers and preschoolers. And three kids later, Soren has yet to disappoint.

In the past few weeks, Soren has gone from trying very hard to say one or two word sentences, to having full on conversations that one can follow. We now have three kids who can debate and argue us and each other. And while my head does start to pund a little sooner in the afternoon, it's fun to watch the conversations flow. However there are a few words he has trouble with.

Obviously he can't say Xavier yet, so Soren has given his oldest brother his very own nickname: Yay-yay. I've found myself accidentally calling out Yay-yay instead of Xavier or Zavi once or twice. The funny part is that Xavier answers to it without batting an eye.

Soren uses Xavier's namke as his testing ground for other words. If a word is too hard he'll tell us "No, too hard, like Yay-Yay. I can't say it." And that's that.

The other funny thing Soren has done on his own, is to try and learn a new word per day. But ONLY one! If you try to teach two words a day he freaks out and says " I ALREADY learned new word today!!! That word for tomorrow!"


Adding all of these together, Soren has made SRM history in saying one word so wrong that I have been equally laughing my ass off and embarrassed when we're out in public. For the word talk, he says cock. And it has made for some funny moments.

When our car was having apocalyptic fits, I had to take the kids with me all over kingdom come to get it fixed. And there were many times that we sat in waiting rooms while we waited for a diagnosis, or new tires, or a new valve. And every time we would sit there, Soren would yell to me at one point or another "MOMMY, COCK WITH ME!!!" "HEY MOMMY, I'M COCKING TO YOU!!!" You can't make this shit up. And of course, every time he made these statements it would be a Volume 11, in a room filled with older adults, and every eyebrow would raise an inch or three and look back and forth between my and my tiny two year old, waiting to see my reaction.

While inwardly I had a moment of cringing, it never failed to make me laugh. Then I'd try to teach him the correct way.

Me: Soren it's TALK, not cock.
Soren: NO! TOO HARD, LIKE YAY-YAY. 'SIDES, I ALREADY LEARNED NEW WORD TODAY. WILL YOU COCK WITH ME?
Me: Soren, I am talking to you. Hey, you know what? It's not really a hard word. I bet you can say it. Say T.
Soren: T
Me: There you go! Now try Ta
Soren: TA
Me: Awesome! OK now, try talk.
Soren: COCK! COCK COCK COCK!
Me:.... Almost. Let's try again
Soren: I SAID IT! I SAID COCK!
Me: Yeah.... I know. But it's talk. Tah.
Soren: (in a very serious stage whisper) I already learned new word today. We try again tomorrow, ok?